雅思考生,下面是一篇大作文,需要加分可要求）大学应不应该将所有学科设置成男女比例一致以下是我的作文原文,What do people consider of gander balance?Should universities accept equal numbers of male and femal

雅思考生,下面是一篇大作文,需要加分可要求）大学应不应该将所有学科设置成男女比例一致以下是我的作文原文,What do people consider of gander balance?Should universities accept equal numbers of male and femal
雅思考生,下面是一篇大作文,需要加分可要求）
大学应不应该将所有学科设置成男女比例一致
以下是我的作文原文,
What do people consider of gander balance?Should universities accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject?Nowadays,this topic is increasingly becoming indiviuals concern.Some people give their opinion that school should not allowed accept equal number in every courses.
From my own perspective,accept the equal unmbers in every subject is not reasonable.There are many reasons to support this idea.First and for most,it is harmful for expand your eyes and enrich your mind.Attribute to the most of different between male and female is logical thinking.As for male,they are favorite in critical thinking,they are not only consider the issue in one part,but also think in all the parts.Male also has better creation than female.They can cope with the troubles which involves several factors as fast as they can.Because of male can transmit their logical thinking quickly.
Female are suitable for memorizing .For example,history and polity .They can arrange the issue in regularly and comat them step and step.Because of personality ,the most of female are very careful to face to the challenges.In this way,they can deal with problem in regularly and it is more efficiency than male.
Admittedly,gander balance is encouraged .But as well know,different gander put different ideas on the same issue,We should not allowed universities put same number in every courses.
To sum up,if all the factors contemplated,the advantages of put different gander in same courses carry more weight then those of people who claim put same number of male and female on the same courses.Because in the way they can get the beneficial efficiency.

雅思考生,下面是一篇大作文,需要加分可要求）大学应不应该将所有学科设置成男女比例一致以下是我的作文原文,What do people consider of gander balance?Should universities accept equal numbers of male and femal
大致看一下好多语法错误.另外文章结构很有问题.这篇我也写过,我当时的思路是开头段：题目的背景+自己观点.第二段：正方观点：支持这样做,列三个证据来支持这个观点,第三段：反方观点：不支持这样做,同样三个证据来支持,结尾段：第一句话可以用让步句,再次强调表达自己的观点.这样文章就很充实,逻辑也比较清晰.而且你的文章的开头写的很不好.建议楼主买PAT的十天突破写作看看吧.

第一段或许可以说做了个小调查，调查结果说明（多少%的人同意或者多少%的人不同意将所有学科设置成男女比例一致，这样更清楚。）
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后面没认真看了。。字太多
纯属个人意见

声明一下，我英语很差，没水平改你的作文，但我从头看到尾了。

gander 是 gender 。里面不止出现一次，看完之后 我满脑子都是 gander

it is harmful for expand your eyes and enrich your mind
eyes我觉得还不如用insights

希望高手能给你看看..